Court vs Private Divorce Mediation in New Hampshire: Why Credentials and Expertise Matter
- Lisa McNally
- Sep 7
- 4 min read
If you’re facing divorce, you may hear about court-connected mediation. For example, in New Hampshire, the Judicial Branch offers court mediation to help families move through the legal system faster and at a lower cost.
But court mediation isn’t the only option. Many families choose private mediation because it provides more choice, flexibility, and privacy. And within private mediation, the mediator you choose — their training, credentials, and experience — can dramatically impact your outcome.
Here’s what you need to know about the three levels of mediation, whether you’re in New Hampshire or considering private mediation virtually.
Court vs Private Divorce Mediation: Court-Connected Basics
When comparing court vs private divorce mediation, court-connected mediation serves an important role, but it comes with limitations:
Mediator Choice – Assigned from a limited court roster.
Credentials – Varies widely; often lacks divorce-specific financial or real estate expertise.
Cost – In NH, typically $450+ per case (cheap but bare bones).
Location – Conducted at the courthouse.
Time Allotted – Usually 1–4 hours, often not enough time.
Preparation – Mediators frequently enter the case “cold,” without reviewing your background in advance.
Scope of Issues – Narrow, limited to custody, support, or basic property.
Agreement Detail – Often minimal and may require later review or correction.
Best Fit For – Simple cases or court compliance.
⚖️ Important Note: In New Hampshire (and many other states), courts often require parties to attend at least one mediation session at the start of their case. What many families don’t realize is that mediation with a qualified private mediator — like me — satisfies this requirement. That means you don’t have to settle for court-assigned mediation if you prefer the privacy, flexibility, and thoroughness of working with a private professional.
Not sure which mediation option is right for you? Download my free checklist: 10 Questions to Ask Before Choosing a Divorce Mediator. It will help you feel confident and prepared as you make one of the most important decisions of your divorce.
Private Mediation (General): More Flexibility, But Varies by Mediator
Private mediation allows families more control and privacy, but the quality depends heavily on the mediator chosen:
Mediator Choice – You select your mediator, but quality and training vary widely.
Credentials – Some mediators may lack divorce-specific or financial expertise.
Cost – Pricing can vary significantly ($$–$$$), often without a clear guarantee of value.
Location – Can be held in an office, neutral space, or virtually.
Time Allotted – Sessions may be longer than court, but often constrained by mediator schedules.
Preparation – Some mediators prepare, but consistency varies.
Scope of Issues – Broader than court, but limited by the mediator’s knowledge base.
Agreement Detail – More comprehensive than court, but may lack long-term detail.
Best Fit For – Families wanting privacy, but willing to accept variable quality.
Private mediation can be a strong option — but without the right mediator, families risk incomplete planning or agreements that don’t stand up over time.
Private Mediation with Lisa McNally: Comprehensive, Credentialed, Future-Focused
Not all private mediators are the same. Many do this work part-time or without divorce-specific training. My approach is different — grounded in experience, credentials, and a full-spectrum understanding of the divorce process.
Here’s what sets me apart:
Mediator Choice – You choose me, a certified professional specializing in divorce.
Credentials – Multi-credentialed:
Certified Divorce Mediator (CFM)
Certified Divorce Coach® (CDC®)
Certified Divorce Financial Analyst® (CDFA®)
Certified Divorce Real Estate Expert® (CDRE®)
Licensed Real Estate Broker (NH & ME)
Cost – Tailored packages: flexible, but comprehensive value.
Location – Flexible: private sessions available in-person in NH/ME or virtually anywhere.
Time Allotted – Tailored to your needs. I devote as much time as necessary — no rushing.
Preparation – I review your case in advance, so our sessions are focused and productive.
Scope of Issues – Full spectrum: custody, finances, retirement, real estate, future planning.
Agreement Detail – Highly detailed, covering both immediate needs and long-term stability.
Confidentiality & Legal Protections Under NH law (RSA 328-C:9), mediation proceedings with a Certified Marital/Divorce Mediator — like me — are privileged and confidential. That means I cannot be subpoenaed to disclose what is said in mediation, except in very rare and legally defined circumstances (such as waived confidentiality, perjury, or abuse) (RSA 328-C:9). This protection ensures you can speak openly and honestly, knowing your privacy is safeguarded by statute.
My goal is to ensure mediation isn’t just about reaching “any” agreement — it’s about creating the right agreement that protects your finances, your family, and your future.
Side-by-Side Comparison
Choosing the right type of mediation can make or break your divorce process. Here’s a side-by-side comparison that shows why families who want clarity, privacy, and long-term stability often choose to work with me.
Which Option Is Best for You?
Court Mediation – Affordable, court-directed, but limited in time, scope, and detail.
Private Mediation (General) – Offers more flexibility and privacy, but mediator qualifications vary widely.
Private Mediation with Lisa McNally – Comprehensive, multi-credentialed support designed to protect both your short-term needs and long-term future — with confidentiality protections backed by NH law.
Before choosing a mediator, make sure you’re asking the right questions. Download my free checklist here.
If you’re ready for mediation that goes beyond checking a court requirement — one that gives you peace of mind, financial clarity, and a future-focused agreement — let’s talk.
Lisa McNally
Certified Divorce Mediator | Certified Divorce Financial Analyst® (CDFA®)
Certified Divorce Real Estate Expert® (CDRE®) | Certified Divorce Coach® (CDC®)
Licensed Real Estate Broker (NH & ME)
Founder & CEO: Optimal Divorce Solutions
Helping families divorce with clarity, confidence, and respect.
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