Creating a Co-Parenting Plan That Works
- Lisa McNally
- Jul 5
- 4 min read
Divorce may end your marriage, but it doesn’t end your role as a parent. If you have children, creating a solid co-parenting plan is one of the most important steps you’ll take. A thoughtful, detailed parenting plan reduces confusion, prevents future conflict, and puts your child’s well-being first.
At Optimal Divorce Solutions, I guide clients through the development of parenting plans that are realistic, legally sound, and child-centered—tailored to their unique family dynamic. Whether you're navigating a high-conflict separation or striving for a collaborative co-parenting arrangement, this guide will help you build a plan that works for everyone involved.
Why a Co-Parenting Plan Is Essential
Structure Creates Stability
Children thrive on routine and predictability—especially during a time of upheaval. A co-parenting plan provides a structured agreement outlining when and how each parent will be involved in the child’s life.
Without a clear plan, even amicable co-parents can run into confusion, missed handoffs, and disagreements. When conflict is present, a lack of a plan can create chaos.
A Good Plan Reduces Legal Conflict
When your co-parenting plan is thorough, you’re less likely to return to court for modifications or enforcement. As a divorce mediator and coach, I help families create detailed parenting agreements that reduce misunderstandings and support long-term cooperation.
What a Co-Parenting Plan Should Include
Every family is different, but there are essential components that every successful parenting plan should address:
1. Physical Custody Schedule
This outlines where the child will live and when. It includes:
Weekly or bi-weekly schedules
Weekday and weekend routines
Holidays and school breaks
Birthdays and special events
The more specific, the better. Ambiguity leads to frustration and disputes.
2. Legal Custody Decisions
Legal custody refers to who has decision-making authority over important issues, including:
Education
Healthcare
Religious upbringing
Extracurricular activities
Many parents share legal custody, but it’s important to spell out how decisions will be made and what happens if parents disagree.
3. Communication Guidelines
Consistent, respectful communication is key. Your plan should define:
How you’ll communicate (text, co-parenting apps, email, etc.)
How and when you'll share updates about the child
Emergency contact protocols
If you're dealing with a high-conflict co-parent, I often recommend parallel parenting strategies that minimize direct communication while maintaining structure.
4. Transportation and Exchange Details
Avoid last-minute arguments by outlining:
Pick-up and drop-off locations
Start and end times for parenting time
Responsibilities for transportation
5. Rules, Expectations, and Boundaries
To create consistency for your child across households, you may want to include:
Bedtimes, screen time limits, or homework expectations
Expectations for introducing new partners
Agreements about discipline and rewards
While you can’t control everything, having shared guidelines fosters stability.
Tips for Creating a Co-Parenting Plan That Works
Prioritize the Best Interests of the Child
Your child is not a piece of property to be divided—they are a human being with emotional needs, routines, and attachments. Keep their well-being front and center.
Ask:
What schedule supports their emotional and educational needs?
How will transitions affect them?
What do they need to feel secure?
As a Certified Divorce Coach and Mediator, I help parents explore these questions deeply before finalizing any parenting plan.
Be Specific—but Flexible When Needed
The more detailed your plan, the less room for misunderstanding. However, build in flexibility for:
Travel
Special events
Illness or emergencies
A well-crafted plan allows both structure and adaptability.
Consider Using a Parenting App
There are many excellent co-parenting apps that facilitate communication, schedule sharing, and expense tracking. Some options include:
OurFamilyWizard
TalkingParents
2Houses
These tools help reduce conflict and streamline coordination.
Address Long-Term Needs
While it’s tempting to focus on short-term logistics, plan ahead. What will happen when:
Your child starts high school or college?
One parent relocates?
Medical needs evolve?
Having these conversations now builds trust and prepares you for future stages.
When Real Estate or Relocation Is Involved
If your parenting plan involves one or both parents moving or selling a home, the stakes are even higher. As a Certified Divorce Real Estate Expert (CDRE), Licensed Real Estate Broker, and Luxury Property Specialist, I guide clients through:
Selling the marital home and coordinating timing around custody schedules
Navigating school district boundaries when relocating
Evaluating buyout or refinance options that align with co-parenting needs
Real estate decisions should always align with the parenting plan—not work against it.
How I Support Clients in Building Strong Parenting Plans
At Optimal Divorce Solutions, I combine divorce coaching, mediation, financial planning, and real estate expertise under one roof. For clients with children, I:
Facilitate parenting plan discussions that reduce tension
Help create written agreements ready for court or mediation
Provide templates, checklists, and ongoing support
Coach clients through co-parenting conflict, transitions, and tough conversations
Whether you're just beginning the divorce process or modifying an outdated parenting plan, I’ll help you do it with clarity, professionalism, and compassion.
Key Takeaways:
A co-parenting plan provides structure and stability for your child
It should include schedules, communication rules, legal custody, and boundaries
Specificity prevents conflict, but flexibility is key for real life
Parenting plans should align with real estate, financial, and life planning
I help clients craft parenting plans that are fair, practical, and child-focused
If you need support building or revising a parenting plan—or you want a professional to help mediate and document your agreement—I'm here to help.
Schedule your free 30-minute consultation today and let’s build a plan that truly works for your family.
Lisa McNally Certified Divorce Coach | Certified Divorce Mediator Certified Divorce Financial Analyst (CDFA®) | Certified Divorce Real Estate Expert (CDRE)
Licensed Real Estate Broker (NH & ME)
Founder, Optimal Divorce Solutions
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