Top 5 Divorce Mistakes and How to Avoid Them
- Lisa McNally
- Jul 8, 2025
- 4 min read
Divorce is never easy, but it doesn't have to be destructive. Over the years, I've worked with hundreds of clients through Optimal Divorce Solutions, guiding them to make informed, empowered decisions that protect their financial future, emotional well-being, and family stability. Unfortunately, there are a handful of mistakes I see over and over again—costly errors that can prolong the process, create unnecessary conflict, and leave lasting damage.
If you're considering divorce or already in the process, here's what you need to know about the most common missteps people make—and how to avoid them with the right strategy and support.
Mistake #1: Letting Emotions Drive Decisions
Why It's a Problem
Divorce is emotional, no question. Anger, fear, sadness, betrayal—they're all valid. But when decisions are made from a place of pain instead of purpose, the consequences are often long-lasting. Whether it's fighting over assets out of spite or agreeing to unfavorable terms out of guilt, emotional decision-making often leads to regret.
How to Avoid It
One of the first things I do with clients is help them separate the emotional from the practical. Through Divorce Coaching, we create a framework that supports clear thinking and sound decision-making. I offer strategies to regulate emotions, set intentions, and stay focused on long-term goals. You can still honor your feelings without letting them control the outcome.
Mistake #2: Overlooking the Financial Big Picture
Why It's a Problem
Dividing assets and debts during divorce is more complex than it seems. Too often, people agree to settlements without understanding the long-term impact on their financial security. They may underestimate future expenses, overlook tax consequences, or fail to plan for retirement.
How to Avoid It
As a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst (CDFA®), I specialize in helping clients understand the full financial implications of their divorce choices. From property division to spousal support, I work with clients to model different settlement scenarios and build a sustainable financial future. This clarity prevents mistakes and gives clients confidence in their decisions.
Mistake #3: Choosing the Wrong Divorce Method
Why It's a Problem
Litigation is not the only option—but many people assume it is. Going straight to court can be time-consuming, expensive, and emotionally exhausting. Not every divorce needs to be a battle.
How to Avoid It
At Optimal Divorce Solutions, I help clients explore all of their options—from Mediation and Collaborative Divorce to Litigation or DIY/Uncontested Divorce. Every case is different, and your process should reflect your goals, budget, and communication style. With my guidance, clients choose the method that best supports a respectful and cost-effective outcome.
Mistake #4: Ignoring Real Estate Complexities
Why It's a Problem
Deciding what to do with the family home is one of the most emotional and financially significant decisions in any divorce. Without the right support, people risk making decisions that damage their credit, equity, or housing stability.
How to Avoid It
I'm a Certified Divorce Real Estate Expert (CDRE), Luxury Property Specialist, and Licensed Real Estate Broker in both New Hampshire and Maine. I guide clients through property valuations, mortgage refinancing options, and sale strategies. Whether one party keeps the home or it's sold, I ensure my clients are protected and informed throughout the process.
Mistake #5: Going It Alone After the Divorce Is Final
Why It's a Problem
Many people believe that once the papers are signed, the hard part is over. But post-divorce life brings its own challenges: adjusting to new budgets, co-parenting dynamics, credit rebuilding, and emotional recovery. Without a clear transition plan, people often feel overwhelmed and stuck.
How to Avoid It
This is where Divorce Transition Coaching and Post-Divorce Planning become essential. In addition to my credentials as a CDC Divorce Transition & Recovery Coach, I'm also trained in Financial Coaching, Career Coaching, and Home Business Coaching. I support clients as they build new routines, establish financial independence, and rediscover purpose. Divorce is an ending, but it's also a beginning—and you don’t have to navigate it alone.
Key Takeaways
Emotional decisions can sabotage long-term success. Stay focused with support from a divorce coach.
Financial blind spots can lead to unfavorable settlements. Work with a CDFA® to protect your future.
Not all divorces require litigation. Understand all your process options first.
Real estate matters during divorce are complex. Hire a professional with CDRE and luxury property expertise.
Post-divorce recovery is critical. Transition coaching helps you move forward with clarity and purpose.
You don’t have to go through divorce alone—and you shouldn’t. Whether you’re just beginning to explore your options or already deep in the process, I can help you take control of your next chapter. Schedule a free consultation today at www.LisasCalendar.com and let’s talk about how to protect your peace, your future, and your financial foundation.
Lisa McNally
Certified Divorce Coach | Certified Divorce Mediator
Certified Divorce Financial Analyst (CDFA®) | Certified Divorce Real Estate Expert (CDRE)
Licensed Real Estate Broker (NH & ME)
Founder, Optimal Divorce Solutions
Comments